by Colleen Wanglund, MoreHorror.com

Directed by Tim Beckley, SKIN EATING JUNGLE VAMPIRES is an independent direct-to-video horror/sexploitation flick. The sole survivors of a race of aliens whose home world was destroyed because they displeased their dark god have crashed on Earth and are living in a volcano in the jungles of Costa Rica. The Clitorians’ (you read that right) home world was populated by mostly lusty women and just a few men. The five women and their leader Mr. Creepo (eye-roll) have been living off the blood, bones and flesh of hapless tourists who wander too close to the volcano.

The Clitorians have recently set their sights on Tiffany (Violet Sweet) as an offering to their dark god, who has promised to give them dominion over the Earth and its inhabitants. Tiffany’s sister Carla (Carla Anderson) has a psychic connection to Tiffany and knows something bad has happened so she goes to Costa Rica to find Tiffany. Carla consults a witch doctor and wanders around the jungle looking for Tiffany and the Clitorians are on to her.

Let me first say that I love indie horror, for the most part, and appreciate the hard work of the filmmakers to get their vision out and seen. I have seen some great indie films but unfortunately "SKIN EATING JUNGLE VAMPIRES" isn’t one of them. Let me begin with the title. There is no skin eating going on, nor is there anything to indicate that the Clitorians are actually vampires. There is a lot of smearing of blood, mostly over bare breasts, and at one point we see the women with a bag of what’s supposed to be entrails but they make no show of eating…only more smearing.

Then there is Tiffany—a sorority cheerleader-type who somehow gets lost in the jungle and is then stalked by the “vampires”. How Tiffany gets lost is a mystery. And when the women catch her there is a lot of groping and slapping but Tiffany seems to protest too much. Carla is so worried about her sister that she decides to take time out for a swim in the hotel swimming pool and then romping in the surf on the beach. Most of the “dialogue” is Carla’s stream of consciousness or the Clitorians’ telepathic communication with Tiffany…and most of it is bad and done poorly.

As for the movie itself it doesn’t seem as though the filmmakers tried very hard. Most of the visuals for the nearly hour and a half running time is stock footage of jungle scenes and what could easily be some tourist’s home video. The gore is almost non-existent and as I’ve said consists mostly of blood being smeared on bodies. The only horror here is that I can’t get that hour and a half of my life back. As for the sexploitation aspect, it’s all boobs and too-close shots of the women swapping spit. I’ve seen better simulated sex on late-night Cinemax. As for Mr. Creepo, he’s just a creep.

There’s more filler than story, which isn’t saying much because the story is so damn thin. The acting is terrible and by extension so is the directing and the dialogue is awful. In my opinion "SKIN EATING JUNGLE VAMPIRES" is a lazy and amateurish bit of movie making. I don’t think even a hard-core exploitation fan would dig this flick. My advice is to just skip it.